


Zolaesque Appreciation

by WhenIFindLoveAgain



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/M, Original Character(s), original - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:53:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 265
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23644165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhenIFindLoveAgain/pseuds/WhenIFindLoveAgain
Summary: Zolaesque Appreciation is just a little thought-work of me missing people I love and have loved before; those I want and think about and those of long ago. Part Two to "Not About Angels"





	Zolaesque Appreciation

**Author's Note:**

> It's still very deep to me. The colour of Belinda's scarves and hats and Jem's thick black hair. I wrote about this before. What did I call the last one? Oh, yes, "Not About Angels".

I looked at her like she was a painting. She was beautiful. And I feel very cold. There was a time he looked at me like I was a painting. Lied about something so he had the excuse to talk to me.

I hate sunshine. I detest it with every fibre of my being.

I'm lying outside on a tartan rug on the grass, glasses and sun-hat on. Breton-stripe vest. The only parts that really matter are my upper body. All that functions I up there.

I miss her and him everyday. There are a few her's and him's. Nassar, Narli, Belinda, a few more that have been like dreams to me, some that perfectly are. 

I want...what do I want? Tanya Reynolds face? No. But it would be interesting to have her character - Teresa Binelli - in my life, even though it would be very cruel and I think she's all alone anyway.

Do I want Jem with his long black hair and dark monolid eyes and latte coloured skin? Yes; and yet when I dream of him, I always see him falling in love and fucking someone else and me being heartbroken or on the sideline or having to take up the "sister" role when I want to kiss his neck.

And do other things.

Sigh, exhale it out.

Look at paintings, create paintings, be my Zolaesque appreciation. I'm very lonely. And sad. And beautiful. Belinda always said it's why I do everything I do and everything that happens happens.

Part of this is artist expression, but, honestly, I really need a friend. 


End file.
